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- i hate myself.
i hate myself.
Hey friend,
We all desire to receive a great deal from life.
We all have a desire to be received by the world in a significant way.
Whether we are aware of this or not, is an “Otro cosa,” another thing.
But we cannot be received by the world until we first receive ourselves.
And in the receiving of ourselves, being received by the world & others becomes irrelevant.
But how does one receive themselves, and all of themselves?
See, its easy to receive yourself in the great moments.
In the moments of victory, of pride, or success
It’s easy to receive the acceptable, noble, recognisable, supposedly honourable parts of yourself.
But this isn’t the full picture of receiving all that you are.
The truth we are all failures in the light of our true potential.
We all have things that cause us shame.
Weakness
Cowardice
Regret
Ugliness
Sadness
Futility
Rejection
And even the part of me that hates what I am.
To fully receive all of yourself, is to fully receive all of this too.
To love all of this too.
To be able to sit with yourself, to nurture yourself, in this space too.
You cannot reject half of what you are and expect to receive the fullness of what you are.
Friend,
I am failure just as much as I am a success
I am weak just as much as I am strong
I am a coward just as much as I a brave
And its only through the recognition & receiving of this, that I can transform it
In a process of what some might call alchemy
In the stepping into a space of what some might call, enlightenment.
-Jay
Jay Topp is a 24 year old writer, marketer, film maker & self-led educator originally from Australia, now based in Buenos Aires, Argentina. You can see his films here. Instagram here. And his business website here.
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