i hate myself.

Hey friend, 

We all desire to receive a great deal from life. 

We all have a desire to be received by the world in a significant way. 

Whether we are aware of this or not, is an “Otro cosa,” another thing. 

But we cannot be received by the world until we first receive ourselves. 

And in the receiving of ourselves, being received by the world & others becomes irrelevant. 

But how does one receive themselves, and all of themselves?

See, its easy to receive yourself in the great moments.

In the moments of victory, of pride, or success 

It’s easy to receive the acceptable, noble, recognisable, supposedly honourable parts of yourself. 

But this isn’t the full picture of receiving all that you are. 

The truth we are all failures in the light of our true potential.

We all have things that cause us shame. 

Weakness

Cowardice

Regret

Ugliness 

Sadness 

Futility 

Rejection

And even the part of me that hates what I am.

To fully receive all of yourself, is to fully receive all of this too. 

To love all of this too.

To be able to sit with yourself, to nurture yourself, in this space too. 

You cannot reject half of what you are and expect to receive the fullness of what you are. 

Friend, 

I am failure just as much as I am a success

I am weak just as much as I am strong

I am a coward just as much as I a brave

And its only through the recognition & receiving of this, that I can transform it

In a process of what some might call alchemy 

In the stepping into a space of what some might call, enlightenment. 

-Jay 

Jay Topp is a 24 year old writer, marketer, film maker & self-led educator originally from Australia, now based in Buenos Aires, Argentina. You can see his films here. Instagram here. And his business website here.

PS. if you refer a friend to this newsletter, you’ll be put on a short list that will receive early access to the films i make, the book i’m writing, in person meet-ups and other cool stuff coming. use the link below to invite (the person needs to confirm their subscription via email).

re: sno convethe lmoney VS ease.trneveself nawothnevee rec